As ottery as possible…

Something is going to have to be done with those damned hamsters! The hat gambit didn’t keep them in line for long, they figured out in short order that they could swap hats without touching making it impossible now for us to know which Cedric is which. Apparently this is important, something to do with temporal continuity. According to Debbie Shorttail getting timelines mixed up can cause fractures in time. These sound like a bad idea all round!!

The trouble is they are so small, they can get through gaps that even otters have difficulty with. Otters are pretty good at small gaps too, they are the right shape but these Cedrics are sneaky. They give Debbie or Brian Russetcoat the slip and disappear down holes, then one reappears in one place and the other somewhere else. They keep turning up in research labs and interfering with experiments. Yesterday they caused such a commotion in the quantum department that alarms were going off all over the place. It was such a to-do that we had to deploy the decoy otters!

It was all I could do to stop the chaps down there shutting them in separate boxes with small amounts of nuclear material. Come to think of it this could have been an admirable solution.

The decoy otters did a fine job of distracting every one though so it all turned out for the best.

Come to think of it, I don’t think I have told you about decoy otters. You may be familiar with the concept of decoys, yes, you know, it is much like when the UK human government does something unpopular and they deploy their decoy politician to distract everyone. You know the chap floppy blonde hair, deliberately outrageous… Boris something… Got all the way to Prime Minister I heard, I wonder what he was trying to distract everyone from with that escapade! Seemed a bit of a liability if you ask me…

Well decoy otters are somewhat like that only far more appealing. Whenever something uproarious happens which threatens to reveal the location of the  Holt, the decoy otters are deployed to distract everyone. They are sent to a popular river or stream, and act as ottery as possible. Stereotypical otter behavior all around is the order of the day! It is quite a fun deployment I can tell you. We all take a turn you know, there is a rota somewhere…

Lucy Littlepaws has found some actual footage of today’s decoy otter antics, I thought you might like to see it…

21 thoughts on “As ottery as possible…”

  1. Those decoy otters are doing a marvellous job! No one would notice any kind of shenanigans with those fellows capering about the place. Much more agreeable than those pesky decoy politicians. Although whenever that particular one is in the news, I always worry what awful thing he is distracting us from… 🙂
    Also, I never knew hamsters were so naughty – I like them even more, now!

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    1. The decoy otters are marvellous, and it seems like such a fun assignment for a otter 😊
      They are much more agreeable than decoy politicians…I worry about that one too.
      The hamsters are extremely naughty…I think I am going to have to find them jobs…

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