Never waste a minnow sandwich!

Hi there!

It’s Lucy Littelpaws here, I thought I’d keep you all informed of what we know so far!

It’s not too much yet I’m afraid but we do have some updates, starting with the wellbeing of Lutra Longwhiskers. We gathered from the certainly deliberate mistakes in his recent dispatch that he was, at least in some way in control of what was being said, but we think now that the OIA miscreants are exerting considerable influence on his decisions and actions! He is in good health though and no harm has come to him, I know that because I engineered an encounter with him in the corridor yesterday evening! After Brian and Debbie were turned away, we tucked into the minnow sandwiches (it wouldn’t be right to waste them!) and made a plan!

I was sent on this mission because, after an announcement like that it seemed only natural that I would attempt to get some words of reassurance for the readers of the Otterbank times. So I pattered my way purposefully along the corridor at a time that, we all agreed, would be exactly when Lutra would absolutely insist on getting some snacks and heading home!

I rounded the corner and there was Lutra, more or less exactly where I expected. He was accompanied by Conrad Shortwhiskers of the OIA. A few steps behind and alongside in the swimlane were two more OIA fellows, or possibly acting as guards and definitely trying to look nonchalant!

Feigning surprise I hailed them stopped directly in front, completely coincidentally blocking their path. I put on my best journalistic voice, produced my little recorder and attempted to question both Lutra and Conrad about just what is going on. There followed a conversation that went something like this:

Me: Hello there Lutra, Conrad, would it be possible to get a quick comment for our readers following your dramatic announcement.

Lutra: Well Hello young Lucy, nice to see you yes of course you can, my word yes wouldn’t want to disappoint your readers now would we

Conrad: Hello, I am not sure we have much to add.

(It is important to note that they said these things at approximately the same time but Lutra kept on talking beyond the OIA leader, I suspect this was a ruse to allow me to ask my next question)

Me: Can you tell me anything about the miscreants that are threatening otter society?

Lutra: Ahh well them I can tell you about, they are the source of a lot of damnable nonsense around here! Let me tell you…

Conrad: *clears throat*

Lutra: Yes, let me tell you… they are nothing to worry about not apocalyptic at all and you should deal with the buggers forthwith!

Conrad: Miss Littlepaws, what Commander Longwhiskers is trying to say is that we have strong suspicions about the identity of the large possibly armed otters of the apocalypse, but that with judicious restriction of use of the time wheel we can re-establish the Holt as a supremely orderly establishment.

Lutra: Now then! I don’t think I was going to say judicious…

Conrad: We must be going, do you have any final questions Miss Littlepaws?

Me: I would just like to ask Lutra how he feels about the restrictions on otter movement

Lutra: That I can tell you! They are quite simply….

Conrad: *Clears throat loudly and steps closer*

Lutra: … Marvellous… yes marvellous of course…

Conrad: I think that is all for now Miss Littlepaws, there is important business that needs dealing with.

With that he unceremoniously marched past me, and the other OIA otters crowed Lutra until he followed. The last thing I heard him mutter as he passed was:

“Not even any decent snacks, dreadful!”

I have had a chat with Brian and Debbie and also Simon Swifttail about this exchange and it is even clearer that Lutra has not entered into this arrangement voluntarily! I think that he was very clearly warning us that the OIA are not to be trusted and that we need to do something to remedy this situation.

It is reassuring at least however that he is seemingly unhurt and doing his best to tell us what he can… in his own way!